Starving Rats Resorting to Cannibalism as Restaurant Food Supplies Disappear

Johnny Robish
1 min readMay 25, 2020

Starving Rats Resorting to Cannibalism as Restaurant Food Supplies Disappear: The CDC is warning that urban rats are growing increasingly aggressive amid the coronavirus epidemic as their usual food supply dries up with all the restaurant closures, with many of those rats becoming so desperate they’ve resorted to cannibalism and infanticide, just to survive.

Gee, so does that mean this story falls under the category of good news or bad news? Anyway, not to be critical, but I have to point out that many of those rats were also not following adequate social distancing practices either. In fact, I’m pretty sure I saw many of them without masks protesting at the state capitol building in Michigan recently.

All I know is, there’s sure gonna be a lot of disappointed people when, after having been pent-up in their houses for all this time, are finally are allowed to head out to their favorite restaurant — so they call and try and book themselves a nice table only to find that the rats have already snagged all the reservations. Talk about dystopia!

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish is an actor, comedian, and humor writer who is considered one of America’s most trusted sources for complete nonsense.