Trump Tells Americans Use Mops and Buckets to Combat Rising Seas

Johnny Robish
1 min readJan 21, 2020

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Trump Tells Americans Use Mops and Buckets to Combat Rising Seas: Donald Trump launched into a scathing attack on recent proposals to build a six-mile sea wall around New York, urging the city’s residents to instead use “mops and buckets” to cope with the rising sea levels.

Sure Mr President, we’ll get right on that mopping business, just as soon as we finish raking the national forests. By the way, whatever happened to that old “Walls Work” slogan of yours?

But I get Trump’s point here, putting up a sea wall is just plain crazy. Of course, building a wall around the desert is nothing short of pure genius. Besides, it isn’t like there’s a whole lotta of people living in Manhattan anyway.

Anyway, the way I see it — there’s no need for New Yorkers to run right out and buy themselves a fancy new mop to soak up all that sea water, not when Trump’s hair ought to work just as well.

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Johnny Robish
Johnny Robish

Written by Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish is an actor, comedian, and humor writer who is considered one of America’s most trusted sources for complete nonsense.

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